That Time at TESFest

TESFesti was looking forward to this weekend for several months, even though i was unsure if it would actually happen, based on the lack of seeing Her for weeks at a time. my hopes would also be that there can be a restart since the past year hasn’t been my idea of what the two of us were supposed to be. More on that, maybe, in a different post. i had no clue how this weekend would be, but in my heart, it was a make or break one. If we couldn’t be on the same page or see things in ways that would be mutually beneficial, i would walk away and know i gave it my all. So, i was anxious because, in my eyes, ‘our’ future was being determined. i was hoping for the best but preparing for the worst.

It already started with Her not being able to come down there with me, which reminded me of how it started last year, so, in my mind, this was NOT a good look and it may be a repeat of what transpired from that time until now. But, i still made it a point to think positive and hope for the best as i couldn’t let any negative enter my mind, especially not knowing what was going through Her head.

i made sure this year that we had our own room as we shared a room last year with others. i figured this would give us needed privacy without having to worry about anyone interrupting or us bothering them. The excitement was built in my head as all i could think about was being with Her for the entire weekend. Originally, because of work, i was only able to stay until Sunday, but i was able to get an additional day off so, i was hoping She’d want to stay until Monday. Luckily, She was willing to stay so we would have an extra day to hang out.

Now, as excited as i was to spending days with Miss Eve, i was also deathly afraid… One, because i would be at Her complete mercy, with no one to stop Her from doing whatever She wanted with me. But, two, i would be at Her complete mercy, with no one to stop Her from doing whatever She wanted TO me. A choice i would make each and every time…. Wishing that it could be happening at this exact moment!

To be continued…..

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She Made me do What? (Conclusion)

Do what?She Made me do What?

So….. i finish the task of sewing in the fetish club and despite the lack of good, sufficient lighting, i did a good job for someone who hasn’t done it in 20 years AND i couldn’t see what i was doing. Miss Eve didn’t seem impressed, more along the lines of, ‘this shit better stay stitched.’ i get it, whatever task i am instructed to complete, must be done to excellent standards set by Her, ESPECIALLY if it’s FOR Her…. Nevertheless, i secretly patted myself on the back because i felt i did a fantastic job under the circumstances.

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She Made me do What?

SewingSo, it’s common knowledge that i enjoy seeing Miss Eve. Another chance seeing Her came about when i went to Paddles (in New York City) the other night. The occasion was a one year anniversary of an event called Bedlam promoted by Vito. Although i knew i was attending the event, i hadn’t told Miss Eve, but, i knew i’d see Her. Let’s just say that fate has a way of being what it is!

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That Damn Tattoo Gun! (Conclusion)

That Damn Tattoo GunThat Damn Tattoo Gun!

But, let me back track a little before i continue to the Tattoo incident….

While coldbreeze was preparing my arm to draw blood, Miss Eve was actually sitting next to me (Comforting me, of course, right?). I failed to mention that the first draw was almost successful, but for some strange reason, let’s just say that my arm didn’t cooperate. i felt the needle go in my arm, the prick wasn’t painful at all. But, i just knew blood would just avoid the pointy thing protruding out of its vessel. The funny thing was that there was a LOT of blood that escaped, not only my arm, but the needle itself. It made for an interesting scene! It was as if Miss Eve was the one who had possession of my arm instead of coldbreeze and Miss Eve, with Her magical touch, caused my arm to bleed. i’m thinking the blood in my body just wants to get out to appease Miss Eve. But, alas, that wasn’t the case. This time……

Now the main event…… Continue reading

An Interesting Night (Conclusion)

NightAn Interesting Night (Part 1)

As i waited impatiently for the Goddess to make Her entrance, the nerves just took over and it affected my mind. Would i regret giving myself to Miss Eve? Is it Her intent to hurt me? Should i have taken some drugs so it wouldn’t matter what i thought? lol Ok, scratch the last question, although i had to wonder if i had enough liquor in me to be able to sustain any painful ‘fun’ i may have to endure!

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Fear May be the Prime Motivator

FearYes, fear can motivate people to do the smallest of things. It can also ‘encourage’ others to stay on the right path instead of suffering the consequences of any action. It can also stop you from advancing based on something that, if taken away, can be beneficial.

Fear of losing someone you care about forces you to right whatever wrong you’ve done. Or, it makes you realize the emptiness that may transpire if you lose the one you want to be with and/or serve.

There’s also the fear of upsetting the one you serve. Fear that making Her upset will lower your standing with the one you serve and admire. Although it’s already been established that You are lower than Her. But, the notion that you want to be seen in a favorable light works against you, if that fear of upsetting Her happens. No one wants to upset the One they love/serve. Continue reading

Gaining Interest in Her Interests

Gaining Interest in Her InterestsThe best part of growth in ANY relationship, is learning more about your partner. And learning about your partner entails knowing more about what interests they have. i feel in most failed relationships, what plays a part is, what you have that is NOT in common with your partner. What makes great relationships is the shared interests but, more importantly, what separates the two as well. Taking an interest in what you may not have an interest in, is what strengthens most relationships. Continue reading